You fucked me.

You fucked me over and over till I couldn’t take no more.

I screamed out RAPE RAPE! but I couldn’t escape

and I looked to my left and others had the same fate.

They told me you’d be hard but I just couldn’t fathom,

all the discrepancies we’d have and now…look what’s happened.

and It was all good between us when the years hadn’t seen us,

back when all I needed to find was a little blue clue,

and when stoop kid was afraid to leave his stoop,

but I guess when he left was when I…

did too

and damn, life beyond the stoop ..man

life beyond the stoop…

man..life beyond the stoop was no walk in the park,

dark, circles round my eyes was when knowledge embarked

itself into my reality and I discovered my…….

 sexuality

and thats when you..

 fucked me for the very first time,

brought me joy in the shape of a man so fine,

gave me emotions and trust, I was so overwhelmed,

thrusted into this everlasting fantasy realm ..

and then as quick as you gave it to me that day.

with a duplicate swiftness you took it away.

damn… you fucked me so hard I couldn’t get up for days,

yea… I.. cried so much I couldn’t get up for days,

and then I re-evaluated my purpose with you,

and you gave me God as a cure for my blues,

and as I saw invisible feet carry me through,

I swore up and down I would never be… fucked by you.

I swore. I swore I would NEVER be fucked by you.

and as I entered a brave new world so alien to me,

I cast my whole being to the fish in the sea,

and I looked to my side to view those like me,

who  had likewise been fucked but somehow came to be..

and in many degrees we stood as bachelors,

but not quite yet, some of us still quite amateur..

and, I thought that I had become celibate,

but I think u fucked me again that time…just for the hell of it

talkin bout late nights and date nights

and test grades that aint right,

and then …some nights

that I cry and scream “GOD!”

just to finish it all and then not have a JOB!?

man you fucked me, as well as everyone I ever met,

and you didn’t give two fucks if arrived dry or wet,

from the rain or the pain, or maybe out of luck.

or if your circumstance left us running amock,

and I know when I leave your arms you’ll just tighten the slack,

even if I got a family and a job on my back.

and I’ve accepted that when I get a nickel, you’ll take out a dime,

cause Life, you fuck me hard anywhere at anytime,

you made me your slut, your hoe and your bitch,

threw me in every corner hole and ditch,

but I still rose to the top after every hit

…and I still found the rabbit after every trick

and I used to cry once, but now I just take it,

like  A soldier, and If I’m not happy then I fake it

and after everything , life, I still am not dead,

and after everything, life, I still hold my head…

and after everything, Life, theres only one thing I beg

just..tell me ahead of time so I can…

open my legs

 (I’ve got to perform this somewhere)

If I were to sit here and tell you about faith,

you’d think I was a fake.

like if I didn’t walk through the same path,

with the same people or share the same laughs

as you, I wasn’t being real. Yo forget that.

Cause I aint at the same bible study or church,

saying “God loves me so much it hurts”,

then I’m not going to heaven or anywhere in life?

Who told you that everything you think is right?

Who told you that you’re perfect and u aint wrong?

cause you at church singing the lyrics to a gospel song?

or cause when you have sex you pray for redemption?

or cause u know psalms it means you’re beyond correction?

No, you judging me is still a sin,

you judging me means you don’t get to win.

Cause I might not be at church everyday gettin my church swag on,

and even though I don’t club, I might wanna put some high heels on,

without fingers being pointed, judging me.

acting like having fun makes me any less holy.

Cause I talk to God everyday and he listens,

talk to him everyday and God aint trippin.

God doesn’t trip when I defend myself to earn respect,

God doesn’t trip when I don’t answer my sisters calls when she calls collect..

God doesn’t trip when I curse my accident,

God doesn’t trip when some days I act trifilin,

he doesn’t trip yo,

He doesn’t trip cause I get blankets when I’m cold,

I have friends to talk to me when I’m lonely,

I have my mother to hold me and console me,

so if I was such a bad person God wouldn’t provide,

God wouldn’t listen to me or guide.

He knows our relationship, not you..

You have no idea what the hell me and God do,

We could be court side chillin at a lakers game for all you know,

We could be stranded at an airport outside of Chicago.

You can judge me by what you see but you’re still blind

you can rally the world to stand against me and that’s fine.

cause when I go home after a horrible day,

I get on my knees and no, I don’t pray.

I talk to God ,cause you know we straight homies and all,

tell him bout my day and whoever is involved,

ask him to forgive them and all their sins,

and when I’m done, I ask him to forgive again.

I don’t pray for myself, cause God awwwreeaddy kno,

to forgive me the moment my knees hit that flo!

cause If I wasn’t sorry I’d avoid him, I’d run away..

kinda when ur principal calls your mom after a bad day.

No, I think I’ll go out, and I’ll try to make it to church, I will.

if I do or don’t…you’ll keep judging me still… 

and I’ll keep doing the things that I do…

cause only one person can judge me…and I don’t think its you.

Michelangelo’s first real painting was the Sistine Chapel, the others were mere portraits and most of them are disputed by scholars. He was a famous SCULPTOR, and when commissioned to do the Sistine Chapel, there are many diary entries that state he was clueless on how to paint a large fresco, having had apprentice painters do most of his small paintings, and mostly copying other paintings . Though he was an apprentice painter he showed more interest and skill in sculpting. 

Davinci was actually first thought to do the Sistine Chapel, but was seen as risky and haphazard. It was actually the rival painter Raphael who convinced the Pope to let Michelangelo do the Sistine because he wanted him to fail KNOWING that painting was not his medium. 

In my description of Janelle I said she was my first painting “watercolor splatters dont count” before sistine all Michelangelo did was basically watter splatters seeing as frescoes were the major form of painting around that time.

So to clarify yes…yes it was his first painting that isn’t disputed or amateur in technique….and NO…he was NOT a famous painter he was a famous Sculptor so please pick up as many biographies as you can, as well as Renaissance painting books. 

:))